It's still hot! And I love it. Seriously, I would rather take 90 degrees any day over cold. I need the sunshine. It speaks to my soul, it rejuvenates, it massages the grumpies out.
I did a run this morning that was rough. My body didn't want to cooperate, I felt sluggish, and slow. I know that tomorrow will be a better day, and that's all that matters. Each step can heal, and tomorrow is a day with new mercies. I'm greatful that God's mercies are new every morning.
I am looking for ways to save money as I embark on this journey. I have a small kitchen, so storage is difficult. I desire to buy fresh veggies and fruit, but have a hard time with being able to use everything in time before it goes bad. It's hard to shop, and cook, and eat for one. That wasn't a typo...portion control is also something I am learning, so it is hard to eat for one.
I was really excited to be able to learn to save my kale for my smoothies in the morning. I am going to blend it up with a little bit of coconut oil and water and freeze it in ice cube trays, and plop one or two into the magic bullet in the morning. It is just one of those tips that makes sense, and helps me save money. I learned how to save berries for use later doing the same thing.
I'm learning with just a little bit of planning, things CAN work. It doesn't have to be this huge overall, of schedules, and bank books, and everything else. I am feeling like things are more and more possible every day. I feel like my body is slowly changing. I did a weigh in today and am down 11lbs from when I first began this process. I was able to put on a t-shirt today that I haven't worn since this fall and this fall it was quite snug. It's encouraging to know the work. The really hard work. The insecurites, the failures, the days when I forget to bring my lunch so I have to turn back around and grab it from home. The soreness from different workouts, and all the bravery are paying off.
There's a bit of fear in all of this, that I have to face every day. I wonder what everyone who sees this blog is thinking. I wonder if I am being too honest about somethings. I wonder if people are wondering why I am doing this. And it honestly overwhelms me at moments. I wonder if I am going to have a rough week or a life-event happen that is super life-shattering and all I'll want to do in the moment is eat ice cream, and pringles. Will there come a moment when I self-sabotage, just because I'm getting too good and too fast of results?
And yet, all I can do is push forward. All I can do is trust that this is what is right for me, and be gentle towards myself when I do make mistakes. I don't have to worry about the future because today has enough worries of it's own.
Seek first His Kingdom and Righteousness and all these things shall be added to you. Mark 6:33.
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