Thursday, November 7, 2013

Weep with those who weep: Share Experiences

It's been awhile...

It's been a while since I have written, and it has been a concious effort to NOT write. I have been working through somethings, and the last thing I wanted to do was write for the public out of a place of hurt, or a place of bitterness, or a place of anger. However, I feel like it's out of that hurt, bitterness, and anger that God is moving in my life. I'm okay with that.

Quick Recap:
My mom has been sick. Very sick. Massive surgeries, losing vision, losing toes, and losing the love of her life very unexpectedly. The man who raised me, my step-dad Bruce, is also very sick, the VA is thinking cancer, dementia has set in, and pain is there. One family member fights a battle against addiction. My job situation drastically changed, my relationship situation drastically changed. People who had said they cared where suddenly MIA. Friends stopped calling etc. Life was one BIG ball of stress, and I felt it in my back, in my shoulders, in my jaw, in my hip, and in my tears.

Moving Forward:
I'm better. I am no longer stressed. I am no longer in tears every day over these things. I still hurt over them once in awhile, but events have a way of passing, and these ones will too. However, I am changed. I think about the language we use a Christians, as the church and wonder if we are helping, or hurting with the things we say.

"God will never give you more then you can handle."---FALSE. The Bible never ever says that. If that was true, explain Auschwitz. Explain the millions of girls being raped every single day across the globe. Explain why children get beaten to death by those who are meant to protect them.

"Everything is GREAT. My family is healthy, and perfect, and we have great jobs. God has blessed us because He loves us." So....those who have family that  isn't healthy? Are we saying that  God, isn't blessing them because He doesn't love them? Those INCREDIBLE HARD WORKING men who are talented and excel in their career, but lost jobs due to unforseen circumstance...God's holding back blessings from them, because they are bad? What about those struggling and fighting mental illness? Is there a form of sin in their lives.

"Pray about it. You will get an answer. God ALWAYS answers." What if they have prayed about it, and God has remain SILENT? What about those people who just do not have the strength in themselves to pray another prayer, because they don't have the faith that God can answer.

Real Talk
Don't for two seconds think that my faith in any of the above circumstances has wavered. I believe with all my heart and soul that God can turn around any situation in any moment, and that is that. Sometimes though our words hurt, those struggling so much more then we know, and they suffer in silence. Let's set one thing straight right now...You may have your dream job, your dream house, your dream spouse, you dream life. God may have paved the way for you to get it. You may have a miracle baby and child on your hands, and I am so incredibly happy for you. I rejoice at your blessings, but don't you for two seconds think that because someone doesn't have those things that they aren't blessed. God just has something different for them, a different understanding of life He wants to give them.

Take a moment. Count all your blessings. Thank God for every single one of them. Make the list: family, friends, wellness, health, jobs, food, breath, now....imagine this, every single thing on that list is gone. Taken away. Tragically, suddenly, or even ceases to ever have existed.

Are you still blessed?

Let's be careful what we say. We don't know who we are hurting. Your brand new home may be beautiful, but to the husband who just signed foreclosure papers, he's blessed too. Even if you or him can't see it. You brand new baby is gorgeous, but what about the woman who can't have children. By saying, "I am blessed." May just speak the message to the barren woman: You are not blessed. God does not love you, because you cannot have children.

The very fact that we have breath. The very fact that we can have life. The very fact that God has chosen us. That makes us blessed.

Take a few moments this week to fulfill the second half of the command: Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Stop telling people to get over it. Stop telling people to pray about it. Stop telling people to give it to God. Roll up your sleeves, and get in the mess with them. Set down your agenda for Sunday morning, and weep with them at the altar. Put a hand on thier shoulder and look them in the eye and ask what is going on. 

Weep with those who weep. The is such beauty in shared experiences.

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